


The Not-So-Common Cold

by affectingly



Category: Star Trek (2009)
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Sickfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-11-06
Updated: 2009-11-06
Packaged: 2017-10-28 17:55:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,986
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/310561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/affectingly/pseuds/affectingly
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bones gets a cold.  Shenanigans and adorableness ensue.  Also, the crew of the Enterprise is kind of ridiculous.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Not-So-Common Cold

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts).



> Beta read by jazzy_peaches*♥ and pororoca*♥.

"Captain," the polite voice of Nurse Chapel comes over the comm in Jim's quarters.

"What's cookin', good lookin'?" Jim asks, smirking at his own cleverness. Twentieth century colloquialisms are _fun_.

An impatient sigh comes back over the comm and Chapel replies, "Captain, I think you need to come down here. It's Doctor McCoy."

"Bones?" Jim sits up fully, frowning at the console.

"Yes, sir. Please hurry."

Pulling the bright gold of his tunic back over his head, Jim shoves his shoes back on and stumbles out the door at a half run. He looks horrible, he knows, having just come off of a grueling twenty hour shift. If he ever had any delusions about what it meant to be captain of a starship, they are certainly gone now.

Trying to comb his hair down with his fingers, Jim rounds the corner into the lift and distractedly jabs at the appropriate button; he’s running through all the possible things that could be wrong with Bones. Things have been fairly quiet around here lately-well, there was that rainstorm planet (whatsits-pinto or something?) where Ensign Rosso had been struck by lightning, but that was a few days ago. Everything has been smooth sailing since then.

The lift beeps, and the door slides open to reveal the Medical Bay, nearly empty. A couple of engineers are sitting to the side with the sort of mild cuts and burns they always seem to pick up on a daily basis (maybe he should speak to Scotty about a safety inspection?), and down the long row of beds to his left is the Ethics Officer being treated for who knows what (probably a permanent hangover).

It all seems fairly typical -- except that Bones is nowhere in sight. Normally, he would be bustling around, glaring at unsuspecting patients and barking out orders to his staff. Jim can’t really remember ever seeing the Medical Bay so serene.

"Nurse Chapel?" he calls out.

Immediately, her blond head peeks around a curtain and she sighs with relief. She looks harried, and rather more annoyed than he even knew she could get. "Oh thank god, you're here. You have got to do something with him."

"Excuse me?" He doesn't really say it out of offense. Hell, half the time Jim doesn't even notice that sort of thing. Insubordination is kind of a hobby aboard the Enterprise. It's just a shock to hear it from Chapel.

She winces and back peddles, "Sir! Sorry! Sorry! He's just being impossible, Captain."

"What the hell is the matter with him?" he asks, following her as she leads him towards Bones's office.

"He's got a --" She's interrupted by a loud shout as they approach the door.

"I TOLD YOU NOT TO CALL HIM DOWN HERE, WOMAN. CAN'T GET ANY RESPECT, EVEN IN MY OWN GODDAMN MEDICAL BAY!"

Nurse Chapel puts her hand on her hip as she walks through the door and glares back at Bones. "And I told _you_ to stop calling me 'woman' like you're some backwoods hillbilly from the nineteenth century, _Doctor_."

Bones snaps his mouth closed and leans his head down on his desk. She turns back to Jim and says, "Sir, please, he's been like this all day. I can’t get him to go up to his quarters."

"What's he got?" he asks, studying Bones. He looks sweaty, pallid despite the dark pink splotches on his cheeks and crawling up his neck. His nose is red and as Bones looks up at Jim, he gives a nasty sounding sniff followed by a hard cough.

"A cold, sir," she answers, and Jim can almost hear how badly she wants to roll her eyes.

"A... cold. Like the common cold, that even I know can be cleared up with a single hypospray to the neck? Do you need me to hold him down or something?" Jim crosses his arms, giving Bones another once over before focusing his attention back on Chapel.

"Unfortunately, Captain, Doctor McCoy is allergic to the standard treatment," she says, like she thinks Bones made himself allergic on purpose, just to ruin her day.

"I’ll be fine, if you would just leave me alone!" Bones groans, looking up again. With what seems like a lot of effort, he stands and adds, "See? I was just doing some paperwork."

He suddenly sways and sits back down heavily. Jim sighs. "Isn’t there anything else you can give him?"

"I’ve given him something for the fever, but he won’t have anything to do with some of the alternative methods we might use on any other patient under similar circumstances."

Bones flaps a hand and starts shouting again. "NOT TAKING THAT QUACK SCIENCE, ANTIQUATED, UNPROVEN –"

"Bones!" Jim yells over him, trying to get his attention.

Bones stops and looks up at him expectantly. "Bones, if you don’t stop shouting at Nurse Chapel, I’m going to tell her it’s okay to sedate you and give you anything she wants," Jim threatens.

Bones lets out a loud, "HMPH," but otherwise makes no further protest.

"What exactly am I supposed to do with a belligerent doctor, Nurse Chapel?" Jim asks, raking a hand through his hair again and leaning against the door jamb.

"He needs to rest, sir. He also needs to drink something that _doesn’t_ have whiskey in it, preferably something with vitamin C and electrolytes before he's dehydrated, too!"

"Right," he sighs and pushes himself away from the door and all the way into Bones’s office. "You heard the lady, Bones. Let’s go. Come on, I’m taking you up to bed."

"I DON’T NEED –" Bones starts, but Jim cuts him off with a sharp look.

"It’s not up for debate. You’re coming with me and that’s an order, Doctor," Jim says sternly.

Bones snorts irritably and it makes a wet sound that makes Jim wrinkle his nose in disgust. Bones grabs a tissue and gives a loud honking blow, and pushes himself up from his desk again.

This time, Jim is at his side, helping him stumble out of his office and towards the lift. Jim turns his head towards Chapel. "The Medical Bay is yours, Nurse Chapel."

"Yes, sir," she nods, watching them leave. Jim could swear there’s a smile tugging at the corner of her mouth.

Dragging Bones into the lift, he presses the control for the correct level as the door closes. He feels a slight weight on his shoulder and looks over to find that Bones has leaned his head against it, eyes shut and a weary expression on his face. Jim can’t help the smile that comes across his own face, even as he rolls his eyes with exasperation.

\--

It's no small miracle that Jim finally manages to get Bones to their room, depositing him onto the bed. Bones is sweaty and clammy from his fever breaking and sways slightly just from the effort of sitting up.

Shaking his head, Jim reaches out and grabs the bottom of Bones' shirt and pulls up. He's hindered only slightly by Bones's heavy, awkward limbs and manages to get both layers off. "Ugh, you're soaking," he complains.

Bones narrows his eyes, staring at Jim mutinously. "I didn't tell you to take my shirt off!" he says, and then immediately starts coughing.

"Yeah, and I didn't tell you to talk. Be quiet before you hack up a lung."

Bones looks like he'd rather cut Jim's ears off and sew them onto his ass, but he stays quiet nonetheless. He sniffs pathetically a couple of times, wiping excess snot off on the back of his hand.

Jim makes a face and turns away to find Bones some pajamas and tissues, not necessarily in that order. "You know, if you weren't so difficult, you could have been kicking back in the Med Bay with Chapel looking after you. But no! Now I'm stuck being your nursemaid, you big baby."

Bones remains silent, but Jim wouldn't be surprised if Bones is currently glaring a hole into the back of his head. He digs through the locker next to the bed, searching for the needed items and hums under his breath as he looks.

Finally, he finds a t-shirt and tosses it at Bones, followed quickly by the tissues. "Can you get out of your pants yourself, or am I going to have to help you with that, too?"

Bones makes a noise that may or may not sound like, "Fuck off."

Jim grins to himself and says, "Okay, I'll be right back. Going to go get you something to drink. _Don't leave this room_."

With one last backwards glance at Bones (who is tugging at his pants in an almost comical manner), Jim steps out of the room.

By the time he leaves the mess, he's laden down with more than he intended. There is soup, juice (two different kinds), hot tea, and a bowl of fruit. Jim feels ridiculous. He makes a mental note to just let Chapel sedate Bones if this ever happens again, and darts out before anyone can ask him what the hell he's doing.

When the door to their quarters slides open, Jim is immediately greeted by heavy snores, louder than any snore Jim's heard from Bones before. He sighs and walks the rest of the way into the room, setting down the stupid tray.

He has to hold back a loud burst of laughter when he finally gets close enough to see Bones in the dim light. Bones is sprawled on top of their blankets, shirt on but rucked up enough to expose his belly button. His boxers are twisted in a weird direction, probably from trying to get his pants off while sitting down. Which, it seems, he mostly succeeded in, except for one socked foot that's still caught in the leg of his slacks.

Gently, Jim tugs the foot free and tosses the black pants onto the back of the nearby chair. He scratches at the back of his neck and stares down at Bones. What the hell does he do now? Is he supposed to wake him so he can eat?

Bones makes a particularly loud snuffling noise and rolls onto his side. Jim stares on, wide-eyed. Maybe he'll just let Bones sleep it off. Colds are kind of like hangovers, right?

\--

Colds, as it turns out, are not at all like hangovers. For one, they last a lot longer (even considering the times Jim _didn't_ have the hangover cure handy), and for another, they are way more disgusting. Jim will take puke any day of the week over the level of mucus Bones seems to produce. It's so… _green_.

He says as much to Bones and is greeted by a red-rimmed glare over a mug of tea. "It's from the infection," Bones says, but it sounds more like, _you have ruined my life and I hate you_ , to Jim's ears.

Jim would take more offense, but he's focused on not laughing. Bones's nose is so stopped up, it's like he's an Andorian toddler who still hasn't mastered Standard. "How did this never happen to you while we were at the Academy?"

Bones attempts to look intimidating, or at least that's what Jim _thinks_ he's trying to do, but then another round of sneezing and coughing takes over, and Jim has to work twice as hard not to laugh. Poor Bones.

Finally, Bones recovers enough to say, "The common cold isn't actually all that common anymore. It's even less likely in an open-air environment." He narrows his eyes at Jim like it's all his fault.

Ah, so another point against space, Jim guesses. The air aboard the Enterprise, while filtered through state-of-the-art environmental controls, is still recycled. Jim sighs and snatches the blueberry muffin Bones hasn't touched off his tray. "That's nice," Jim says conversationally.

Bones looks extra disgruntled and he swats Jim's hand away when he makes another grab towards the tray, this time for the apple juice. "That's mine! Can't you keep from stealing my food even when I'm on my deathbed?"

"If you were really on your deathbed, Bones, I might consider not taking your juice, but since you're clearly going to live, it's fair game." Jim gives him a bright grin and then takes a bite of the muffin.

Leaning his head back, Bones groans and Jim can hear the congestion rattling in his chest. "Don't you have something to do? I should be sleeping."

"You've been sleeping. Eat now. I'll be going to the command team meeting in a little while."

"Finally! If I have to be stuck here, a little quiet would be nice."

Jim laughs. "Sure, Bones, whatever you say. You'll be in here snotty and miserable without me."

"I'd be snotty and miserable with you. Probably more miserable," Bones replies, rolling his eyes and reaching for a tissue, as if to demonstrate the level of snotty he can achieve with Jim in the room.

Jim ignores it. "I'll only be gone for an hour. Two, tops."

"Dammit, Jim, I don't need a babysitter! I'm a doctor, not some kid with the chickenpox."

"Bones, I don't think there's been a recorded case of chickenpox since like 2067."

"2115, but that's not the point."

"Of course you would know that," Jim says, exasperated, "And don't think of it as babysitting. Think of it as someone bringing you tea and sandwiches so that you don't starve."

Bones opens his mouth as if to argue his point further, goes still, and then sneezes twice. Jim picks up the container of tissues and hands them over wordlessly. Poor Bones, indeed. Standing, he leans over and brushes his lips to the top of Bones's head. "Feel better," he murmurs, and turns to leave.

Just as he reaches the door, Bones says, "Hey, Jim?"

He looks back. "Yeah?"

Bones hesitates for a second, rubbing at his eye with the back of his hand. "Could I get some more tea?"

Jim smiles. "Yeah, I'll send someone down."

\--

Everyone is already seated when Jim finally strolls into the meeting. "Morning everybody, how's tricks?"

Scotty and Sulu laugh, Uhura rolls her eyes, Spock lifts an eyebrow, and Chekov says, "Sir?"

Jim flops down in his chair and kicks his feet up. "What's the status, Ensign?" he clarifies.

"On course, Captain. No incidents to report," Chekov replies, grinning.

"Great! What's on the agenda today, Mr. Spock?"

Spock pretends to check his PADD for his notes. "It seems the Ethics Officer has registered another formal complaint with regards to the command team's methodology."

Jim perks up. "Does that make this the fourth time?"

"The fifth," Uhura says.

"So what is it this time? Or am I still just blatantly flaunting the Prime Directive?" Jim asks, with maybe a little too much delight.

Spock ignores it. "If I may, Captain, perhaps Lieutenant Barashi would be more amenable to your approach if she perceived that you were taking her thoughts under advisement with regards to away missions."

Jim levels him with his best Serious Look. "Commander Spock, are you suggesting I _pretend_ to listen to her?"

Spock lifts a slanted eyebrow and says, "I was merely attempting to point out that were you to sit through the entirety of her briefings with regards to the cultures and customs of the target planets, Lieutenant Barashi would likely consider it an act of good faith."

"Oh, just checking." Sometimes, it's easy to see why he and Spock are meant to be friends. Dude is way sneaky, for a Vulcan.

"As we have no further items on the agenda, Captain, might I enquire after Doctor McCoy's health?"

Scotty nods. "Aye, my engineers came back from Med Bay last night and reported a bit of a dust up. Is he feeling any better today?"

"Chapel tells me he should be getting better in another twenty-four to forty-eight hours," Jim answers.

"Have you told Doctor McCoy?" Uhura asks.

Leave it to Uhura to go straight to the heart of the matter. "Ah, not quite yet. I am, however, accepting volunteers for the privilege of informing our irascible Chief Medical Officer that he's not allowed back in his Medical Bay for another two days."

The room is, predictably, silent. Even Spock seems to have occupied himself with an urgent matter on his PADD. "Typical."

\--

When Jim gets back, he finds Bones passed out again, a PADD splayed haphazardly across his chest and his tea still steaming on the bedside table. By the sound of Bones's snores, Jim's pretty sure he's breathing through only one nostril, which should probably be more disgusting than charming. Leave it to Bones to muddle the line between the two.

Jim stifles a yawn and checks the display by the door. Just enough time for a nap. He crawls in next to Bones and picks up the PADD, glancing down at the glowing screen. Jim cracks a smile when he realizes it's a medical journal. He's pretty sure Bones is incapable of taking it easy.

He's about to put it on the side table with the tea when Bones startles, eyes flying open. "Jim?" he croaks, his voice raspy and barely audible.

"Sorry, Bones. Just trying to get some sleep while I can. You know what they say, new mothers should always sleep when the baby sleeps." Jim laughs, grinning even wider at Bones's answering scowl.

"It's like you _like_ seeing my miserable." Bones makes a grab for his PADD.

Jim holds it out of reach and shakes his head. "No way, you need to sleep or you're never going to get better. I can't have my CMO out of commission."

"Dammit Jim, I'm the doctor here, not you. I'll be back to work by tomorrow."

"You know, that would be way more convincing if your voice didn't sound like you've been gargling lava all day. Sorry, Bones, but Chapel told me you weren't cleared to do any work at all, that you needed to relax in order to recuperate. You've got another twenty-four hours of mandatory sick leave, at least."

Bones is starting to turn an obvious shade of red, but before he can really launch into a tirade of protestations, he sneezes and then immediately starts coughing. Jim hands him tissues and waits.

Finally, when it seems like he's done, Jim says, "I think that probably proves her point, Bones. You gotta stop working yourself up." He reaches out and brushes the hair away from Bones's sweaty forehead. He knows Bones must feel really terrible when he doesn't even try to bat Jim's hand away.

"That's stuff I need to read _as your CMO_ ," Bones says, but Jim can tell he's already giving in. Exhaustion colors his voice and he sighs, letting himself fall back against the pillows.

Jim looks at the PADD again, and then back at Bones. He can feel the smile pulling across his face even before the idea is fully formed in his brain. "How ‘bout we make a deal. You lie back and rest and quit giving me a hard time, and I'll read the article to you."

"Are you serious?" Bones asks, incredulous. He blows his nose, as if to emphasize how ridiculous he thinks Jim is being.

Jim rearranges himself in bed so that he's leaning against the headboard, setting the PADD on his lap. "Yes. Now where did you leave off?"

There's a long pause, and Jim's almost certain Bones is ignoring him, but then he says, "Subheading C."

Finding his place, Jim takes a breath and begins. It's an article about a new way to synthesize antidotes to local flora and fauna poisons a crew may encounter on away missions.

Bones's eyes slip shut as Jim reads, but occasionally he makes a noise of agreement or mumbles about how ridiculous the authors are, "These idiots have probably never left the safety of their labs on Earth. I figured out how to use vytiomine as a base six months ago when you got bit by that venomous rabbit."

"Like I wanted to remember that."

"You're the idiot who tried to pet it."

Jim opens his mouth to argue, but thinks better of it. He did try to pet it. How was he supposed to know it had fangs? Shaking his head, he picks up reading again. After a while, he realizes Bones has actually fallen asleep.

\--

Chapel comes by the next evening. "Don't worry, Doctor. M'Benga and I have everything under control," she tells Bones as she scans him with a tricorder.

"Lovely." Bones looks just as disgruntled as he sounds, but Chapel doesn't seem to let it bother her.

She tucks a stray piece of blond hair behind her left ear and says, "I'll clear you for duty in another twenty-four hours, so long as you can keep from sneezing on everything."

"Another day! Have you lost your damn mind?" Bones promptly sneezes several times in a row.

Chapel consults the results on the tricorder and amends, "Better make that thirty-six hours."

"Remind me to thank you for allowing me back in my own damn Medical Bay."

"Somehow, I think Chapel doubts your sincerity, Bones." Jim can't really help the amusement that colors his voice. Besides being disgusting and a little pathetic while sick, Bones also manages a new level of cantankerous that is kind of hilarious.

Bones _hmphs_ in response and Jim's pretty sure he catches Chapel rolling her eyes. She tucks the tricorder into her lab coat and turns to Jim. "He's mostly better, but he's still contagious, so it's best if he stays confined to your quarters, Sir. I know most people aren't allergic to the cure, but I'd rather not get an influx of patients."

"Understood, thank you, Nurse Chapel. You think you could give him a sedative so I don't have to sit on him to keep him from busting out?"

Bones makes another disgruntled noise and says, "I can hear you, you know! Fired! You're both fired!"

"You can't fire me, Bones. Captain, remember?" Jim grins, winking at Chapel, who stifles her own laughter. "And I'm pretty sure you probably shouldn't make those sorts of threats to a woman with access to several incurable diseases."

Choosing not to comment, Chapel inclines her head to the side. "Captain, if you don't need me for anything else, I need to get back to the Med Bay."

"Of course, Chapel, you're dismissed." Jim watches her go before turning back to Bones. "You know, sometimes I'm surprised your staff hasn't revolted and shoved you out an airlock already."

"I wonder the same about you every day," Bones answers, before blowing his nose fiercely.

Jim rolls his eyes. "Sometimes I wonder when insubordination became cool."

"Don't look at me. You're the one who started the trend. I'm sure Spock could refresh your memory if you've forgotten."

"Maybe I'll ask him when he comes by later."

This gets Bones's attention. "When he what?"

Grinning, Jim flops down on the bed next to Bones. "Oh, didn't I tell you? He's making you some traditional Plomeek soup! Very thoughtful of him, don't you think?"

"Jim!" Bones shouts, and then starts coughing, just as Jim suspected.

"Okay, well, here are the tissues. I'm going to jump in the shower. Don't die while I'm in there," Jim says as he hops up and walks towards the bathroom, Bones's scowl following him the whole way.

\--

Smelling remarkably better and with a fresh uniform on, Jim leaves the bathroom to find Spock already there, sitting stiff as a board next to Bones.

For his part, Bones seems to be at least trying not to look disgruntled. Spock stands when he sees Jim, hands clasped behind his back. "Captain."

"Spock, no need for formalities in my quarters. We’ve talked about this."

Spock lifts an eyebrow. Jim's pretty sure that particular version of the eyebrow means he's uncomfortable. Or constipated. Well, they're basically the same emotion, so Jim figures he's got it right. Spock tilts his head almost imperceptibly. "Of course, Jim."

Bones sighs. "Are you two done yet?"

"My apologies, Doctor. How are you finding the soup?" Spock asks as he turns back to Bones.

"It's great, thanks. Now, back to our earlier conversation--"

"I have already expressed my thoughts on the matter, Doctor. It would be --"

Bones holds up his hand, stopping Spock. "If you say 'illogical' one more time, I swear I'll--"

Jim laughs. "I think that's enough excitement for you, Bones. Spock, see you soon."

Spock inclines his head. "I believe it is customary to wish you a hastened recovery, Doctor. Lieutenant Uhura also requested I convey her well wishes."

Bones narrows his eyes at Spock like he's trying to decide if Spock is mocking him somehow. Finally, his posture relaxes and he leans back against the headboard. "Tell her I said thank you," he pauses and then, "and thanks again, for the soup."

Spock nods one last time to Jim, and leaves. Jim watches in amazement as Bones polishes off the rest of the soup. "So you really did like it?"

The scowl returns to Bones's features. "How should I know? I can't taste a damn thing right now!"

It really shouldn't be so funny, but Jim can't help the burst of laughter.

\--

Day Three of Bones's forced recuperation is the worst. Not because Bones is sicker, but because he's feeling well enough that he's driving Jim crazy. "This is a conspiracy!"

Jim rubs his hand through his hair and falls back on the couch. "Not a conspiracy, Bones."

"Then why are you forcing me to stay on sick leave? I'm fine!"

"Listen, Chapel said--"

"I think the Plomeek soup helped. Chapel came before I had the soup. Look at me! I can breathe out of both nostrils, even."

Jim shakes his head. "You're championing Vulcan recipes now? That's a little desperate."

Bones glares back at him and starts coughing. It's not as wet as it was the day before, more of a dry hacking, but it's still enough that Jim doesn't have the slightest doubt in Chapel's diagnosis. "Drink some tea."

"I don't want more goddamn tea, Jim!"

Sighing, Jim gets up and goes over to Bones. "Would you just let yourself get better? How many times have you told me that if I would just let myself heal, I'd be _out of your damn Med Bay, already_?"

Bones crosses his arms and shoots Jim a mutinous expression. "I'm remembering this the next time you're swearing six ways from Sunday you don't need medical attention after being skewered by spear-chucking squirrels."

"Spear-chucking squirrels, that's a good one," Jim says with a wink.

"And don't wink at me! I'm not your girlfriend."

"No, just my pain in the ass."

"Right back at you."

Jim crawls into the bed, ignoring Bones's complaints. "If you stop whining, I'll put on your favorite movie. I'll even watch it with you."

"I can put on my own movie."

"Yes, but I think the important part of that offer was that I'd watch the movie with you, Bones."

"Like I want you around! You'll probably talk through it."

Jim pokes Bones in the side and scoots closer to him, putting his arm around his shoulders. "I wouldn't dream of it."

\--

When Bones finally gets cleared for duty, Jim's pretty sure there's a bounce to his step. He sits down on the bed as Bones gets ready for his first shift back. "Wow, it's like someone just told you we’ve got shore leave."

Pulling his science blue tunic over his head, Bones sends him a sour expression, but it isn’t enough to hide his good mood. "What are you talking about?"

"You're practically glowing!" Jim says, pointing at Bones.

"Stop being stupid." Bones slips on his shoes and glances in the mirror, combing his hair into place with his fingers.

Jim feels a fond smile spread across his face, watching Bones's morning routine. He didn't think he could miss something like that. "Do me a favor, Bones."

"What?"

"Don't get sick again, okay?"

Bones rolls his eyes. "Sure, let me go ahead and promise the medically impossible."

"Don't you always?" Jim asks, reaching out and pulling Bones towards him.

Bones stands between Jim's legs, looking down at him. "Only when you try to get yourself killed."

"Giving preferential care to your significant other? What would Lieutenant Barashi say?" He pulls Bones down for a kiss, smiling as Bones grumbles about being late for his first shift back. "Bones, you're their boss. I think they'll overlook it."

"What about my boss?" Bones asks, kissing Jim again, his hands coming up to frame Jim's face.

Jim pulls Bones the rest of the way down until he's straddling Jim's lap. "Oh, I heard he's really easy to bribe."

"Oh yeah?" Bones is smiling now.

"Yeah, and besides, I'm pretty sure you owe him one." Jim drops his hands to Bones's legs, pulling him closer.

"Is that right?"

"Uh huh."

Bones chuckles softly, the vibration tickling Jim's neck as Bones licks the sensitive skin there. "Well, you did take awfully good care of me."

"And it wasn't easy."

"Don't push it." Bones kisses Jim hard, biting and teasing until Jim is breathless. With one last peck on the lips, he pulls away from Jim, standing up and straightening his shirt.

Jim's brain is foggy, struggling to catch up with what just happened. "What?"

Lifting an eyebrow, Bones says, "I really do need to get down to Medical, Jim."

"Are you kidding me with this? I thought I was about to get a thank you lay!"

Bones shrugs, a wicked gleam in his eyes as he walks towards the door. At the last moment, he turns to Jim. "Why don't you stop by later, Jim. I think you're due for your physical."

He's out the door before Jim can reply. Jim's fairly certain he's not due for another physical for at least a few more months.


End file.
